


Child Soldiers

by orphan_account



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Age Appropriate Clone Shenanigans, Angst, Clones, Cody - Freeform, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fighting, Fluff, Food Fights, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, I just love the clones okay, Mando'a, My poor babies, Nightmares, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rex - Freeform, Rex is a hugger, Sports, They're children okay, ahsoka - Freeform, gratuitous mando'a, he will hug people
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-22
Updated: 2020-01-27
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:40:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22362739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: The clones reach battle ready maturity at age 10. Ready physically and mentally for the front lines. But, emotionally...they're just little boys playing cops and robbers.This will be a series of oneshots from different points of view.Chapter One - Rex/NightmaresChapter Two - Ahsoka/WomenChapter Three - Obi Wan/Loss (Umbara)
Relationships: CC-2224 | Cody & CT-7567 | Rex, CT-7567 | Rex/Ahsoka Tano
Comments: 14
Kudos: 222





	1. Even in The Dark I Saw You Were The Only One Alone

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by a line in of Nerve and Nerf by countessofabiscuit where she describes the clones as "a bunch of overgrown kids with blasters protecting the republic. As well as pretty much everything by collegefangirl3791 and skywalking-across-the-galaxy(BadWolfGirl01) because honestly do you even TCW fanfic?? (Check my bookmarks, you're welcome)
> 
> Mando'a translations at the end.
> 
> Chapter One title from Hot Gates by Mumford and Sons

It was just after 0200 when Rex was making his way back through the sleeping barracks from the Refresher, dressed only in the bottom half of his blacks. The lights were out, the communal sleeping space lit only by small recessed lighting near the floor to allow he and his brothers to see should they need to be up and moving quickly in the middle of the night cycle. Most of the shadows in the bunks were still, some snoring softly, arms and feet hanging off of bunks haphazardly as well as a few where the men were sharing for one reason or another. 

Movement caught Rex's eye and he glanced over into the shadows nearer the wall. The movement was restless, followed by quiet noises of distress. Rex pursed his lips and veered off from the path to his officer's barracks, making his way to the sleeping Trooper. 

"Hey," Rex said quietly, sitting on the bunk next to the other man, moving slow and careful, mindful of his injured ribs, " _vod_ , wake up. You're all right." 

The younger man's head whipped toward Rex's voice, but his eyes stayed closed, his face screwed up with pain and horror. Now that Rex could see his face, he recognized the trooper as one of the shinies that had joined the 501st at the last personnel transfer on Kamino. Rex kept his voice pitched low and slowly reached out to lay a hand on the kid's shoulder, hoping he was not so far gone that he would deck Rex before he recognized where he was. 

"Bullseye," he tried again, bringing his other hand up to the side of the younger man's neck, "Bullseye wake up, you're okay, _vod'ika_. You're safe." 

Suddenly Bullseye's eyes snapped open and he shot up on the bunk, simultaneously shrinking away from Rex's touch with a small gasp. 

Rex lifted his hands to be nonthreatening and leaned back. "Easy, _vod_. Easy." He said, keeping his voice pitched low and soothing. It wasn't the first time Rex had helped a _vod_ out of a nightmare and he knew from the times when someone had helped him that having a little space while one gained their bearings was better than crowding. 

Rex watched Bullseye's eyes dart around the room, his breath coming in ragged gasps. 

"Hey, you alright?" He asked, lowering his hands. 

Bullseye's amber eyes snapped to his and in the low light he could just make out the tears standing in them. 

"What was it?" 

Bullseye's throat worked, swallowing convulsively as he tried to find his voice. "We-," the word came out as a croak and he paused, swallowing before he tried again. "We were on Deltaanis...there was an explosion and," the young trooper cut himself off and his eyes widened until the whites were visible all the way around.

"Domino!" He cried, his movements suddenly frantic, still clumsy and wrapped in his blanket from his nightmare, he pitched forward and nearly toppled to the floor in his haste to get up. 

"Hey, hey," Rex grabbed him by the shoulders, pulling the younger man to his chest, wincing when the kid's flailing arm hit him square in his injured ribs. "He's fine, he's fine, look. He's there."

Rex had Bullseye pulled close, chest to chest with himself, one arm wrapped around his shoulders. He could feel the tremors wracking the younger man's body, his free arm extended to point at the next closest bunk where another Shiny still slept soundly. "See? He's okay. You're both safe." 

_This time._ He added, in his head.

But a reality check wouldn't help his _vod'ika_ right now. They wouldn't always all make it back, he knew. He knew this shiny knew it too. But the campaign on Deltaanis had gone pear shaped in a major way and Rex was thankful to all the little gods that they hadn't lost more men than they had. 

As it was Kix and Coric were still overrun with wounded in the med bay. Rex was deeply regretful that this batch of shinies first battle had to be such an ugly one. 

Rex felt Bullseye's shaking tick up a notch and brought his other arm to wrap around his shoulders, resting his hand at the back of his neck when Bullseye dropped his forehead to his Captain's shoulder. 

"He...he....I thought...." He choked out between gasps, the sound of his valiant efforts to hold back tears twisting Rex's heart.

_"K'uur, vod'ika."_ Rex squeezed him tighter, " _Haalur_." 

Rex stayed silent as the trooper got himself back under control and released him when Bullseye started to shift in his arms. 

_"Jate?"_

Bullseye nodded jerkily, swiping one hand across his eyes and pulled his legs up to his chest. 

He swallowed thickly, though Rex noted his cheeks were mostly dry. "Thank you, sir. Sorry...sorry if I woke you." 

Rex shook his head, "you didn't." He made no move to get up, instead leaning his elbows on his knees to face slightly away from Bullseye, toward Domino, still asleep nearby. 

"Your _ori'vod_?" 

Rex heard Bullseye shifting behind him on the bunk. 

"We're batch mates. I don't...I don't remember a time when I didn't know him." 

Rex nodded, staring blankly at the floor. "He was in your dream?" 

A small choked sound came from behind him and Rex turned to see Bullseye staring unblinkingly at Domino. 

"We were pinned down, surrounded. I saw him...there were so many bodies. I thought..." He cut himself off and met Rex's eyes. "Are all battles like that, sir?" 

Rex pursed his lips. _No_ , he thought bitterly, Umbara and Zygerria flashing through his mind, _sometimes they're worse_. 

"No." He said simply, suddenly so thankful that the _Resolute_ had been able to bring them aboard for a little rest before the next campaign on the other continent. He didn't want to imagine his shinies trying to cope with the horror of this battle in nothing more than canvas tents while the seppie barrage shook the ground beneath their bedrolls.

Bullseye nodded and looked back over at Domino. "I understand. I just..." he shook his head slightly, squaring his jaw, seeming to draw strength from his _ori'vod'_ s proximity. "Thank you sir. I'll...I'm sorry about the outburst, sir." 

"No need, Trooper." Rex took a deep breath, biting back a wince when it flexed his chest too widely and wrapped one arm around his ribs, reaching the other to Bullseye's shoulder. "Try to get some sleep." 

The younger man didn't respond, but the shadows in his eyes told Rex what he already knew. Bullseye wouldn't be sleeping anymore that night.

"Bullseye?" A sleepy voice croaked and both men turned to see Domino sitting up, scrubbing one hand over his face. "You alright, _vod_?" 

Rex felt the tremors start up in Bullseye again and gave his shoulder a quick squeeze before standing. His _ori'vod_ had him now. 

No sooner had Rex vacated the spot on Bullseye's bunk than Domino filled it and Rex heard the hushed tones of softly spoken Mando'a as he began making his way back through the barracks. Before he opened the door to his room Rex glanced over his shoulder and could just make out the shape of two bodies huddled together on Bullseye's bunk. 

Maybe Bullseye would get some more sleep tonight after all.

With a soft sigh and a sad smile he opened the door to his bunkroom and closed it behind him. Of course, he hadn't mentioned to the shiny the reason he was awake wasn't having to use the Refresher. He hadn't needed to really. More just needed an excuse to leave the confines of his lonely bunk room, a moment to escape the horror of the images in his head, walk among his _vode_ and see them safe and breathing and _alive_. 

Rex dropped onto his bunk and leaned his elbows on his knees, rubbing one hand across his short blond hair before resting it against the back of his neck, struggling with an old, internal debate. 

"Kriff it." He swore, swiping his communicator off his bedside table and entering a frequency from memory, punching the buttons with a little more force than necessary. After a few pings his room was illuminated with a soft, flickering blue glow and the sight of Cody in his blacks, rubbing sleep out of his eyes. 

"Rex?" 

"Hey _ori'vod_." Rex smiled slightly, some of the tension leaking out of him just at the sight of his best friend. "Sorry to wake you." 

"S'okay." Cody said, sleep slurring his normally careful speech. "You alright?"

Rex nodded, glancing down at the bandage Cody could doubtless see on his end. "' _lek_. Just...rough campaign. We got about 50 shinies in last week and...I would have liked almost any other battle to break them in on, you know?"

"Ah," Cody nodded, sitting up. "Sorry." 

Rex nodded, staring into the darkness, lost in thought. He didn't realize how long he'd been quiet until Cody's voice cut through his thoughts. 

"Sure you're okay, _ori'vod_?" 

Rex signed and nodded, wincing again when he forgot his injury, earning himself a flickering glare from Cody. 

"Yeah." 

Cody looked at him for a moment before leaning back against his pillow, setting his comm down beside him, prompting Rex to do the same. 

"Remember our first campaign?" 

Rex snorted a laugh. "I remember you tripping over a downed tinnie and falling into a lake." 

"My boots squished with every step for the rest of the cycle." Cody smiled, "And if I recall correctly Cadet Rex thought he didn't need his night vision and ended up walking right into a tree at speed. Dented your helmet the very first day." 

Rex laughed again, despite his injury and his eyes fell closed. "Gods we were shiny." 

Cody laughed along, a sound most never heard that he kept reserved, almost exclusively anymore, for his _ori'vod_ and, occasionally, General Kenobi. He nodded. 

"Hard to believe how shiny sometimes." 

Rex hummed. 

After a moment Cody spoke up again. 

"Remember your first KP?" 

Rex huffed. "I was framed." 

"Yeah right, _vod_ ," Cody said around a chuckle, his own eyes closing. "You were the only one who knew how to reprogram smoke bombs in our company. The barracks smelled like wet bantha for a week!" 

Rex just smiled and shook his head. "I had an airtight alibi. I was on guard duty." 

"Just means you had an accomplice." Cody cracked one eye open to find Rex already looking at him. 

"And yet I ended up serving my KP time all alone. Why is that again, Cody?" Rex raised a challenging eyebrow but Cody saw through the teasing and shrugged lazily. 

"Hells if I know." 

Silence stretched out between them for a few minutes, each pretending the other wasn't a hundred parsecs away.

"I should let you get back to sleep." Rex said finally.

"Yeah," Cody reached for his comm. _"Ca'jate ori'vod."_

_"Ca'jate,_ Codes. _Vor entye."_ Rex said, his voice rough, already feeling sleep tug at the edges of his mind.

_"Kih'parjai._ Get some sleep. We'll see you planetside in a few weeks, Rex." 

Rex nodded and moments later the blue light disappeared, his room bathed in inky darkness once more. With careful movements, he rolled over to face the wall, pulling his thin blanket up to his chin. 

Rex drifted off within moments, the silence of his room suddenly easier to bear. 


	2. You Should See Me In A Crown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pretty women have a way of seperating the men from the boys. 
> 
> Chapter Two - Ahsoka/women

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit of fluff to counter the angst in the next chap.
> 
> Title from You Should See Me In A Crown by Billie Eilish

Ahsoka huffed and made a face at her reflection.

“This isn’t working.”

Stark naked in her room on the Resolute, she put one hand on her hip and lifted the strips and scraps of fabric she’d been given to wear on her undercover mission to Zeltros.

“This Separatist General better be there.” She grumbled to herself, holding the fabric in front of herself and tilting her head to one side. “This is worse than that absurd getup I wore on Zygerria.”

She huffed, closing her eyes and reaching for her training bond with Anakin.

_Master, this thing is ridiculous._

__

__

_I know, but thats what pleasure workers on Zeltros wear, Snips._ Came Anakin’s reply, no little amount of amusement accompanying his words across the bond.

_Why do I always have to play the pleasure worker?_

_Because we haven’t finished perfecting your charm yet._

Ahsoka sent the impression of a rude gesture and rolled her eyes at the new wave of amusment from her master.

I can’t even get this kriffing thing on! The straps make no sense.

_I’m stuck in a holomeeting with the Council preparing for this mission. Get one of the men to help you._

Ahsoka rolled her eyes again, pulled on her underthings and walked to the door, sensing a couple familiar Force signatures passing by in that very moment.

“Guys?” She said, poking her head into the hall.

Fives had his nose buried in a data pad, on his way to report what he’d learned about the Zeltrosian defense capabilities to Captain Rex, Tup walking beside him, when they heard their commander’s voice behind them.

“Commander? Something wrong?”

Ahsoka had that pinch between her white markings on her forehead that meant she was annoyed.

“You could say that.” She rolled her eyes and waved at them casually, already heading back into her quarters, “Can you come here for a minute?”

Fives furrowed his brow and exchanged a quick look with Tup, who just shrugged, and followed their commander into the room.

They both stopped dead just inside at the sight that greeted them, the doors nearly clipping the back of Fives’ kama when they shut.

“Uh-“

Ahsoka turned just before removing her underthings to try and put her outfit back on upon hearing a choked noise from behind her.

“Fives?”

“Sir!”

Fives suddenly snapped to attention so hard Ahsoka thought he might pull a muscle, and his gaze locked onto the wall with laser focus. Beside him Tup had gone  
a shade of red she’d never seen on a clone before and was staring at the floor.

“Whats wrong?” Ahsoka started to walk toward rhem but stopped when Fives seemed to get even more tense, if that were possible.

“Nothing sir,” he squeaked. _Squeaked._

Ahsoka quirked a smile that was equal parts confusion and amusement.

“At ease Fives, you’re going to hurt yourself.”

Fives just nodded but didn’t ease into parade rest as she expected.

“What is it?” She asked again, growing concerned. All of a sudden the only thing she was getting from the Force from either of them was discomfort.

Fives cleared his throat. Twice.

“Sir, you’re, uh, out of uniform.”

At that Tup snorted and bit his lip hard to stifle himself, eyes still glued to the floor, hands fisted at his sides.

Ahsoka rolled her eyes. “Yeah, I know, I need help getting into this outfit I’m supposed to wear to Zeltros.”

At mention of the pleasure planet Tup seemed to lose the last shreds of his self control and began to giggle near hysterically.

“What about the General?” Fives asked, still staring past her, his voice sounded more like she’d asked him to diffuse a bomb than to help her get dressed.

“Apparently he’s busy.” She sighed, “Guys, c’mon, relax. This isn’t that different from what I wore when we went on liberty at that beach planet last year.”

Fives begged to differ. It was very different. She’d...grown a lot since then. And they weren’t in her quarters then. And she hadn’t been trying to take anything off back then.

Very very different.

Ahsoka rolled her eyes at Fives and looked at Tup, who was laughing so hard now some of his hair had come loose from his bun and was falling into his eyes, his cheeks were flushed bright red.

"Tup," she said, sounding bored, "are you having some sort of break?"

Tup gasped and choked and snapped back to attention, his gaze never leaving the floor.

"Yes sir. I-I mean no sir. I-" he trailed off into giggles again.

"Ugh," Ahsoka sighed deeply, "what is the big deal?" She glanced down at herself, "It's just anatomy! Togruta don't even have half the same stuff humans do."

She paused when this comment sent Tup into such fits he looked about to fall over and Fives had still not moved a muscle, though a vein was pulsating in his forehead from the effort not to move.

With another, dramatic roll of her eyes she turned, making her way back over to her mirror.

"Ok, fine, get out of here. And if you happen to run into someone a little bit more mature than either of you would you mind sending them this way?"

A chorus of "sir, yes sir!" rang out and then Fives and Tup practically tripped over eachother in their haste to escape Ahsoka's quarters.

Once back out in the main hall, Fives and Tup heaved a sigh of relief and began walking the way they'd come, each lost in their own thoughts for several moments.

"Hey, uh, Fives," Tup said, sounding unsure of himself.

"Yeah?" Fives held his datapad tightly, though he was no longer seeing anything on it.

"You know the uh, at 79s? You know how sometimes there are...dancers? Like..."

"Yeah, I know."

"Oh, okay. Yeah," he lifted one hand to fuss with his hair and then rested it on the back of his neck, "Have you ever...you know...approached one of them? Like...done things with them?"

Fives glanced over at Tup to find him red from the neck of his blacks to his hair, but his eyes full of curiosity and wonder.

Fives sniffed and straightened his shoulders, "yeah, Of course I have."

Tup's eyes widened. "You have? I mean. Oh. Cool." He nodded fast, trying to look unaffected. "Yeah. Me too. I mean...well...I've talked to them, a couple times." He blushed deeply again, remembering the "talking" had been more like muttered apologies when he'd bumped against a scantily clad Twi'lek on his way out of the Refresher.

Fives grunted and they lapsed into silence as they entered the lift to take them to the command deck.

"Fives?" Tup said quietly, several seconds later.

Fives turned to him, Tup was studying his boots.

"You think we could go...to 79s? Together I mean. And you could show me...I don't know." He shrugged, "how to..." he trailed off, grimacing. "I'm not that good with girls." He said, finally. How could he be? He'd been raised with 100,000 male siblings.

Fives smiled at his vod'ika.

"Sure Tup. I'll show you everything I know." Which probably wasnt as much as Tup thought it was, but Fives wasnt going to admit that out loud.

Instead, he smiled like a wolf and clapped Tup on the shoulder.

"But right now, I have someone in mind who I think just might be mature enough to help our Commander with her little wardrobe problem."

An hour later found Fives, Echo and most of Torrent Company in the Training room aboard the Resolute.

Echo was leading an impromptu spar lesson, showing a couple advanced ARC grappling techniques to the troopers and Fives stood off to one side giving pointers and correcting form.

"Spark, if you don't spread your legs you're going to twist your-"

_"FIVES!"_

Everyone paused and turned to see Rex standing in the door, glowering across the room.

Fives stood from his crouch beside Spark, fighting a losing battle with a smirk.

Where everyone in the room was dressed in just the bottoms of their blacks, sweaty and flush from exertion, Rex wore his full armor, and the flush on his cheeks appeared to have nothing to do with any of them.

"Sir?" He said, too innocently.

"You're on KP. Indefinitely." Rex growled.

Fives cocked his head to one side. "I'm not actually a part of your company sir. I'm not sure you can assign me KP."

"I think I just did." Rex did an about face to leave, but Fives called out after him.

"What for, sir?"

"You know exactly what for, Fives." Rex said, turning back around slowly.

Everyone else in the room had backed up slightly toward the wall, not wanting to be too close to their Captain, who was practically crackling with anger, and the ARC, who appeared not too have noticed.

All except Echo, who couldn't seem to decide who he wanted to look at more, the captain or his ori'vod.

"I don't think I do, sir." Fives pressed, full on osik-eating grin on his face. "If you were to enlighten me I'm sure I could come up with an explanation for whatever it is you think I deserve KP for."

"Fives," Echo said his name quietly, a warning.

Rex appeared to be struggling with words, and his temper. His hands repeatedly clenched and unclenched at his sides.

"What's the matter, Cap?" Fives said, his smile turning devious. "Togruta got your tongue?"

Later, while sitting in the med bay, Fives was still grinning when Kix treated his swollen black eye. When questioned as to how and why he got it, the only answer the ARC would give was that it had been _totally worth it._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Review if you like!  
> Next chapter: Obi Wan/Loss


	3. My Sense of Wonder's Just a Little Tired

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The scars from Umbara run deep, they will need each other to make it through.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yup, it's another Umbara fic. Honestly, Dave Filoni owes us all therapy for that arc. Could be Codywan if you wanted to see it that way.
> 
> Title based on Lost by Dermot Kennedy

Obi Wan wandered through the nearly abandoned hallways of _The Negotiator_. There had just been a shift change to the night rotation, so there was some movement but for the most part the men had gathered in the mess or the barracks or were just starting their duties for the evening.

He was exhausted, more than his recent role in the campaign required. The battle he and Cody had commanded on their front on Umbara hadn't suffered the losses the 501st had, though the Umbarans put up quite a fight and it had been several days since he'd had a decent nights rest. Still, the weight he felt on his shoulders and chest was mostly due to the weight of the Force onboard. It was better now than it had been on the planet, after Krell...there the Force had positively _ached_.

Now the men were coming to terms with the massive personnel losses they'd suffered, their fallen _vode_ , but the dark blanket of anxiety, grief, confusion and anger still rippled dark and cold through the Force, making it near impossible for the Jedi to sleep.

Instead of tossing and turning all night Obi Wan had taken to roaming the halls, as he often did after a difficult campaign, hands clasped behind his back and head bowed. He sent calm and warm and Light out to his men, as well as being aware of any sharper spikes of pain or distress from someone that might call for his attention.

One such spike suddenly shot through the Force and he found himself making his way quickly to a familiar door.

Obi Wan frowned, then raised his hand to the door chime. He'd been to these quarters countless times, of course, but had never sensed such emotional turmoil on the other side of the bulkhead before.

It took Cody just a few seconds longer than normal to open the door, his expression carved from stone. In fact, his face was so utterly blank that Obi Wan almost questioned the validity of what he'd sensed.

Almost.

The Commander had good sheilds, better than most Clones, probably due to his additional command training. But Obi Wan could still sense the dark despair radiating out of his Commander, and in some ways, closest friend.

"Sir?"

"Good evening, Cody." Obi Wan said, just a note gentler than normal, "May I?"

Cody inclined his head and took a step to one side, allowing entrance "Of course."

The officer's quarters were small, compared to Kenobi's own, but also a bit more cozy due to the size as well as the few personal items displayed, treasured gifts from his vod. Obi Wan had always liked Cody's room.

Cody stood watching his commanding officer make his way around the perimeter of the room, looking at every item as if he'd never seen them before, which of course, he had. He got the feeling he was meant to feel as if the General wasn't really paying him any attention when in fact the man had 100% of his focus on him. It seemed like Kenobi was waiting for something.

Cody cleared his throat. "What can I do for you, General?"

Obi Wan turned to him with a small smirk. "I've invaded _your_ quarters, Cody. I think you can feel free to use my name."

Cody didn't respond except to raise an eyebrow, emphasizing his question.

Kenobi held his eyes for a moment longer before turning to look out Cody's small view port, his voice soft and gentle.

"How are the men? I know Umbara was..." he paused, "extremely difficult."

_Understatement of the Millennium._

At the mention of Umbara Cody's shields faltered for just a moment and Obi Wan felt the sharp spike of despair again, causing him to suck in a quiet breath. But the walls went back up quickly and his Commander responded with nary a waver in his voice.

"They'll manage, sir."

Obi turned around. "I'm not asking after my battalion, Cody. I'm asking about my friends."

Cody brought his eyes up quickly and met his General's before turning them back to the floor.

"They're...confused, sir." He said trying to sound more steady than he felt. "And mourning. We lost a lot of good men."

_Waxer. Oya. Left Eye. Gundark. Chase..._

Cody screwed his eyes shut and forcibly stopped his mind from continuing. He couldn't _do this_ now.

"Yes we did," Obi said, gravely, watching Cody from across the room. Cracks were forming in his shields, the pain and heartache starting to bleed through and he worried what would happen to the younger man when the levy broke. "I'm sorry about Waxer, Cody. I know you were close."

Pain flittered across Cody's face before smoothing away again, and he took a deep breath, opening his eyes and locking them on the wall opposite the door.

"Thank you sir," he said quietly, his right hand gripping his left behind his back tightly. "Me too."

There was a long silence where Kenobi was painfully aware of the cracks in Cody's eyes and face and shields growing larger, before he saw Cody's lips move to say something Obi Wan didn't quite hear.

"What?"

Cody sighed. "It should have been me. Not...not Waxer."

Obi Wan took a step forward before he could stop himself. "Why would you say that?" He paused, but his second made no move to answer. "Cody, look at me."

Cody did, though it seemed to take great effort to do so.

"Why would you say that?" He repeated, earnest.

"Waxer was," Cody paused struggling to find the right word. _Good, kind, open, approachable, funny, easy._ "Everything I'm not," he said, "the men need him."

"Oh Cody." 

Obi Wan said his name so gently, so full of empathy and concern it was more than Cody could bear. He his control slipping away and hunched his shoulders under the darkness and pain that had been plaguing him since Rex's com came through after Krell was killed.

_He tricked us, Ori'vod. He said they were the enemy but they weren't. They were **brothers**. _

"The men need you too, Cody."

Cody shrugged one shoulder, unable to speak past the burning tightness in his throat.

Obi Wan watched openly as his Commander struggled for control, flexing his hands to keep from crossing the room and folding the man to his chest, unsure if the comfort would be wanted.

Cody's throat worked, his Adam's apple bobbing as he tried to swallow and find air and find something to hold onto in a galaxy that was suddenly spinning too fast.

_Glitch. Gizmo. Rally. Dice..._

Cody's vision blurred around the edges and he blinked carefully, trying to make his breathing more even.

_Udesla. Wes. Sketch. Titan. Red..._

**_Stop, please._** He pleaded with his mind, closing his eyes tightly and didn't notice the tears that slipped out the corners.

"Cody?"

_Army. Beskar. Face. Hotshot..._

**_Please!_ **

"Cody!" Obi Wan crosses the room and placed a hand on Cody's shoulder, the waves of pain coming off the man were nearly enough to put the Jedi off balance, but it was Cody's legs who gave way and Kenobi was forced to follow him, slipping an arm around his waist as he carefully lowered them both to the floor.

"Cody, please, what is it?"

Cody shook his head, kneeling with his hands flat on the floor in front of him, eyes still shut and cheeks wet.

"I don't... _haar'chak_." He growled, forming a fist to punch the floor, taking comfort in the hot flare of pain that shot up his arm as well as Obi's strong grip wrapped around his waist. Before he could do it again (because this _hurts_ , damn it, and he doesn't know what else to do about it) a wave of calm and peace washed over him.

He would have to thank his General for that later.

"I don't understand, sir." He croaked, finally.

"Don't understand what?" Obi Wan prompted immediately, though he knew there were many things about Umbara that didn't make sense. He just wondered which it was that was bothering Cody the most.

"I can't...this shouldn't," he shook his head again, as if trying to clear it. "I've been on the front lines since I was 10," Obi Wan winced, like he always did, when reminded of the Clones true age, "I've lost men before. Good men. This shouldn't... _hurt_ still. Like it does."

Obi sucked in a sharp breath, shifting to press more of his side along Cody's.

"Cody...I know it hurts. I know it's awful but...it has to hurt. As long as it hurts we know we're still alive. That we're still...human."

It was then that the levy broke and Obi Wan felt the last of Cody's shields fall and the wave of anguish that flew out of him brought tears to Obi Wan's own eyes. Without thinking, he reached around with his other arm and pulled Cody to his chest, tucking his head under his chin, the way he used to for Anakin when he was small and suffering from nightmares or particularly intense Force visions.

Cody shuddered and wrapped his arms around his General, sobbing harder than he had in all the four years he'd been on the front lines. Not since he was seven and the first time he met a batch mate he'd known who'd been reconditioned, had he cried this hard. The blank look in his friend's eyes when he greeted him still haunted Cody to this day.

"Waxer shouldn't be gone. Not at the hands of _vod_. It's _not right_. _Vod_ don't kill _vod_." He shook his head miserably, letting Obi Wan shush him and lay a hand on the back of his head.

"I know Cody, I know. I'm sorry _ner'burc'ya_."

Obi Wan held Cody until the shaking subsided and they both shifted until they were sitting side by side on the floor, leaning against the side of the bunk and each other.

They stared blankly across the room at nothing, both too exhausted to pretend things were okay.

"I think I want to go see my _vod_." Cody said finally, his voice raspy from tears.

Obi Wan nodded and gave his shoulders a gentle squeeze where he still had one arm draped over them.

"I think that's a good idea."

"You want to come with me?" Cody turned his head slightly toward the other man. Kenobi met his gaze and gave a slight smile.

"I'd like that."

* * *

Cody and Obi Wan made their way quietly into the barracks well into the night cycle. The room was short but wide, with the entrance and a small sitting area at one end with one row of lights on, while the rows of double bunks extending toward the other end in darkness.

Upon entering they came upon a group of a half dozen men from Ghost and Diver Company sitting talking quietly so as not to disturb the _vod_ sleeping in the other end of the room. A few of the shinier men started to stand when they saw Obi Wan but he quickly waved them off and they relaxed.

Cody approached the group right away and Obi Wan watched Boil, Peel and Upstart each envelop him in a hug in turn, pressing their foreheads to his and whispering words in Mando'a. Cody stood back, meeting their eyes, a hand on their shoulders, murmuring and nodding, even drawing a wet laugh from Peel.

_Oh Cody,_ Obi thought with a sad smile, _to think you question whether these men need you._

After a few minutes the men went back to their conversation and Cody stepped away. They all looked exhausted, but Obi Wan guessed they couldn't sleep.

He didn't need to wonder why.

He watched Cody approach a shiny, a kid really, whose name Obi Wan couldn't remember and was sitting off on his own. The commander settled down beside him closer than normal, the men always craved physical contact after a battle. Obi Wan couldn't hear anything being said, but watched Cody's lips move as he brought one hand up to cup the back of the young troopers neck, drawing a few staccato nods from him. Slowly the kid began to bend further over toward his knees, shoulders shaking and fists clenched. Immediately Cody wrapped his arms around him, pressing his face into the kid's regulation length hair.

Obi Wan pursed his lips together and turned to look toward the back of the barracks where the men slept, wishing to give Cody and the other man a measure of privacy.

In the dark Obi Wan could make out several empty bunks, more than there should have been even with a third of the men on duty and the handful that were still awake. He realized quickly that was because almost every bunk that was in use had at least two men in it. In fact, several of the bunks had been pushed together and there were tangles of limbs with feet and arms sticking out in all directions that spoke to three or more brothers sharing the space like a basket of Alderaanian puppies.

Obi's mouth quirked when a trooper, he thought it was Crys, made a noise of protest when someone in his pile moved and elbowed him in the gut.

"You should get some sleep, General."

Kenobi turned to find Cody walking past him, his arm still around the younger man as he pulled him along beside him. The kid had tear tracks on his cheeks still but now looked ready to collapse from exhaustion.

Obi wan nodded. "You're quite right, Cody." But he didn't move. Instead watched Cody lead the young man to a nearby empty bunk that had been pushed together with its neighbor and gently begin removing his armor as the kid tried (and failed) to keep his eyes open.

"C'mon _vod'ika_." Cody said, trying to get the kid to move so he could undo his utility belt.

"Let me help." Obi came over and together they got the half asleep young man stripped to his blacks and laid out on the bunk. Then he turned and began the same process on Cody. It was a testament to the man's exhaustion that he didn't protest.

It was when Cody was down to his own blacks and crawling into the bunk beside the shiny that Obi Wan noticed Peel doing the same on the other side of the double bunk and Boil was beside him getting out of his armor.

" _Ca'jate_ , boys." Obi smiled lightly, as if the idea of returning to his own cabin, lonely and devoid of the soft warmth emanating from the men as they comforted each other cost him nothing at all.

He turned to leave but was stopped by a strong hand around his wrist and Cody giving him a knowing look.

"You're welcome here, General." He said quietly, the shiny already curled against him and snoring softly.

Obi was about to protest when Boil spoke up from the other side of the bunk.

"Yeah, shouldn't sleep alone on a night like tonight. _Dush'kara_ **."**

Obi wan hesitated, then nodded.

Bad luck. They certainly didn't need anymore of that, did they?

Stripped down to his leggings and tunic, Obi Wan climbed into the double wide bunk and was immediately enveloped by arms and warmth. It took some doing, a lot of shifting and a few muttered curses and empty threats, but they all settled in a comfortable position and drifted off.

Obi Wan stayed awake longer than the others, listening to the _vod's_ breathing as they slowly became in sync with one another until, finally, the steady hum of a feeling in the Force he'd affectionately named _mirjahaal_ gently lulled him to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ner'burc'ya - my friend  
> Dush'kara - bad luck  
> mirjahaal - healing
> 
> I'm open to prompts if anyone has any! The next should be another lighter chap.

**Author's Note:**

> K’uur - hush  
> Vod - brother  
> Vod’ika - little brother  
> Haalur - breathe  
> Kih'parjai - don't mention it


End file.
